Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Kissing Fat Girls

I kissed a fat girl once. That's not saying much considering that I'm bean pole thin. Makes me wonder, how thin exactly is a bean pole? She was huge. Tripple chins, flabby under arms, perhaps it was genetic... I didn't make it a point to ask. I thought it may be rude. She was my first real make out session. Sadly it wasn't until my senior year in highschool. As embarassing as it was, I was a late bloomer. My second make out session was also with a fat girl, well, not fat but chubby. The good kind of chubby, real woman. She was a beauty.

Some people have a fanatic "virgin" complex and won't kiss anybody unless they are in love with them. I call this vanity of self with the fear of self defilement. They think they will dirty themselves in some way by making intimate contact with another human being. Either that or they are bashful; not that there is anything wrong with bashfulness. It's more charming than vanity. Kissing isn't sex (I thought I'd point out the obvious). More often than not there is some who believe any physical contact require intimacy. I beg to differ. These people have obviously never been punched in the face. I'm sure this would change their opinions quite readily. Some think a kiss contains all the knowledge... and the chemistry. It's the connection which bonds two souls. Or, it could just be a kiss.

There's nothing wrong with kissing fat girls. It's odd how many bean pole thin guys, who are also tall, get short chubby wives for their mates. It's also odd that many of these blonde barbie fem-fatales end up searching for true love constantly. Maybe it's because they are bad kissers? Perhaps thin babe-a-licious girls need to take notes. Fat girls can kiss. There's not doubt about it. They get all the guys.

Where are all the hunks? Are they either gay or testostrone/corporate driven capatalistic fiends seaking glory and riches? Where did all the good men go? That question is common enough. Maybe they're all out kissing fat girls. There's nothing wrong with kissing fat girls.

P.S.

I kissed a skinny girl in a hot tub once, but I would need a different subject title to post this story under, wouldn't I?

Anyway, I've given all that up. Girls... that is. I always seem to see the potential for failure.

Okay, that's a lie. I gave it up because...

I found the most wonderful girl and we adore smooching. She's a hotty, and not at all overweight. She's the spitting image of a Goddess. She's my Japanese beauty. Has an Asian exotic beauty which will leave anybody awe stuck and oogling. When I'm with her I see other peoples jaws drop to the floor. She's that amazing looking!

I guess puting on a few pounds myself changed for the better! Fat guys with hot babes. Wait, that sounds like a CBS sitcom. But I'm not fat, nor am I a ninja warrior. Still scrawny and without stealth skills. I hope all of this information has been more than beneficial to my numerous readers. All four of them.

Anyway, I hope I answered her question to the best of my ability.
3 before and none after or ever again shall be kissed by your's truly,

The Luckiest Guy in the World.

No comments: